Sit Down Saturday | You can choose your friends but not your family!

You must be there for your family they say. You must be loyal, caring, protective and supportive to them.

Today's choice of tea: Pukka 'Love' Tea (chamomile, lavender flower & organic rose.)

I used to stand by this, with family being the most important thing, and they are, I mean my Mum, Dad, brother, Aunts, cousins, uncle-in-law, god-parents... the list goes on. But I've realised that friends are family. Neighbours are family. I don't have to go by anyone's opinion. I have family members that don't act like family. Such disloyalty and stupidity I've seen. If anyone hurts anyone in my family, yes I will go biserk! I feel as though I must protect the ones I love. Sure everyone does!

My truest friend, I choose the word so carefully because I believe there are very few out there in the world that are as rare as my friend EdelBelle! (her actual nickname.) Her family are as good as family to me as well. On the morning when my gran passed away, she was the first person I rang. She took a whole week of college off to be there for me. And she let me go through the stages of grief. She acted how I expected her to act. She made me laugh when I most needed to. My god-parents and neighbours were there the whole way through our suffering as well. Let's say my parents chose well for god-parents. I will always care for these people for the remainder of my life. If only that could be for certain family members.

But we do try, don't we? We try to make an effort, to build relationships with our relatives. For instance, I have my grand-parents, now living in Scotland. I love them as they are. And I know they love me. However, with their decision of leaving Ireland to go live in the Caribbean when I was just about 9 or 10, I felt heartbroken. I only then saw them every 5 years or so. What I have to understand is that they are living their own lives. They should do as they please. They are like strangers to me sometimes. They wouldn't know what interests I have now. I've changed quite a bit since I was a child. They tell me they're proud of me, of my music, my choices in life, my courage and faith. As I said before, we do try to maintain the relationships we have. I don't want to lose them. I have such great memories with them. As to that, when I have kids, I hope to have my parents in their lives as much as possible. From my own experience, I became what I am with the help of all four of my grandparents and my two great-grandparents.

I know this post sounded quite sad, especially as it's a Saturday, and you're looking for an upbeat sort of blog post, but this came to mind when I was sitting down with my tea.

I'm visiting my grandparents in Scotland in just eighteen days, so yes I'm nervous and excited to seeing them. I have Edel and my family coming with me, so not so awkward. "Why hello, long time no see... what's it been? Five, six years?"

Anyway, be wise as to the friends you choose and to the relationships you commit to. At the end of the day, it's their support that matters.

Lots of love,